Update...I'm still here.

Hello to you, Dear Reader! It has been almost two years exactly since my last post. Not that very many folks were reading, but many of you understandably may have assumed the worst by my long absence.

I'm here to say that thankfully, this wasn't the case! It has given me a chance to reflect on some things though, I mean my time away. I began this blog as a means to chronicle what happens to a person in my shoes, so that they could be forwarned a little bit, and know what to expect. Our medical system has made many wonderful advances, but there are some areas where they are still lacking, and it seems like explaining to a patient what to expect in a certain timeframe is one of them. They tell you some things, but the don't or can't, tell you everything. So you have to learn to ask questions. Sometimes tough questions, that you may not even be sure you want to know the answers to. And, not to slight the doctors, but, they don't always have an answer. They'll tell you that themselves.

So when I left off, I was telling how I had had surgery, which failed, and radiation, which also failed. Have you ever felt "up against it"? I did. I mean, here I had had seed implants, pills, (Which are only designed to manage the growth and spreading of the disease, not cure it), radiation, surgery, more pills, injections, etc, and nothing was working. Add to that, people all around me were getting cured of the same cancer I had. Yes, I looked skyward and asked "Whazzup"??These treatments also wear you out. I mean you become very tired,and can't think straight. Then there's recovery time, which gets worse as time marches on.

I'm very thankful that cancer is getting a better success rate these days. I'm very happy for those whose stories have happier endings than mine, and other folks that I know. I'm serious about that. But there are those like me, whose stories don't appear on the surface to be as happy as others. Let me tell you that isn't necessarily the case. I'll come back to this later, because I have some other things I want to tell you.

I was in a place that was very dark. I was running out of energy and hope. I was deciding which direction I would go next, with the help of my wife, when a friend suggested we try Cancer treatment Centers. You've seen the commercials. So, we made an appointment. I have to tell you, even if I had never had any more relief from the cancer, I still would have gone there. These folks were wonderful to us. It was the shot in the arm that I needed, at just the time I needed it. I think it really helped Lisa, my wife, too. It was at this point in my treatment that I was kind of forced to resign myself to the fact that I was not going to see a cure. However, it was also here that I was taught how to really improve my quality of life. I know that there are a lot of other cancer centers that are now doing the same things, and praise God for them! But this was the facility that God used in my life.

 I had a treatment called Provenge, that tries to stimulate your white blood cells to fight the cancer, which didn't work. Also some pill and injection regimens, which worked for awhile. Then they put me on a chemo pill they call xtandi, (extandee), which not only didn't work, it made me sick as a dog. I literally thought it was going to kill me. They tried reducing my dose, but it didn't reduce my misery. Evidently, I'm a very rare case. Most people have good results with that, but not me. So there was no recourse, treatment wise, but for me to go on chemotherapy. Either that, or just ride it out to the end of the trail. So long story short, that's where I am today. I just finished up 12 chemo treatments, with good success, and they are giving my body a rest for awhile, don't know how long, just until my numbers start to climb back up. Could be 3 months, or a year or more, we will see. I also had to go into the hospital last year for breathinh issues. Turns out I now have COPD and congestive heart failure as well, so, I won't be in the Boston marathon this year, sorry...

I mentioned earlier that I would come back to something. You know, I could take a look at my story, and, on the surface, I could allow myself to become very bitter and depressed if I wanted to. No one would really blame me, and a lot of people choose to live in their circumstances that way. I don't want to do that. I have to tell you, that through all this God has never left me. I love Him, and He loves me. I know that if he doesn't cure me while I live down here, (He could, have no doubt about that please), He is going to cure me when he takes me home, That is an absolute promise right from His Word. The Bible tells us that  it is appointed unto man once to die. We are all in the same boat here. It may be cancer, my heart may give out, or maybe COPD will take my ability to breathe away. Or, maybe I'll just walk up to some gang banger and slap him and call him an idiot. But somehow, some way, I'm going to die. So are you. dear reader. The question is, what about after this life? Are you ready? Have you asked Christ into your heart? I have. It was the best decision I ever made. Don't put it off, do it now. Jesus loves you, just confess to Him you are a sinner, and ask Him to save you. I want to see you in Heaven. Ok, that's it for this time, see you soon, hopefully, before two years.